So, what’s next?: A wedding professional’s guide to things to remember after your wedding

So, you’ve finally made it to the other side of your wedding day — one of the most elating, energetic days of your life. You’ve made your promises in your vows, danced the night away, shared your love with your friends and family, then made your exit with every one of them cheering you on. You’ve honeymooned, explored the world as new spouses, and basked in the joy of committing to one another. Allow me to be one of many to say, congratulations. 

But, now you’re back home, the suitcases are (hopefully) all unpacked, and that wonderful life you committed to must start falling into place. There is quite a bit to do, and compiling a list might seem impossible. There are some things you cannot accomplish without doing a whole list of other things first, but then there are even more things tied to that list of things. You might wonder, How on Earth am I to remember all of this, let alone sort them? Believe me, I understand. 

That is why I have compiled a list of things for you to remember to do after your wedding. If you’re reading this before getting married as a way to plan ahead, I admire your incredible foresight. For what plans to make, take a look at my Hard Questions to Ask Before Getting Married blog. 

No. 1: Paperwork

I know that this is the last thing a newly-married couple wants to deal with. However, I always say that the longer you put certain things off, the more likely you are to run into problems later. 

Remember how I mentioned some tasks that stand in the way of others? Changing your last name is one of those. If you’re going to be taking your spouse’s last name, get that done as soon as possible. Once the legal change is complete, make sure to update things such as your modes of identification, voter registration, bank account, and even your social media profiles. Notify everyone that has to be notified, including your bosses and doctors’ offices — essentially, anywhere your last name is of any importance to standard procedure. 

Regardless of whether you’ve changed it legally, consider whether you are going to change your name socially and professionally, and then make sure to cross that off your list.

With everything up-to-date, open any joint bank accounts, consolidate debt, and enact any other financial plans you decided on before the wedding. If you each have assets and/or property in your own name, it’s time to make sure both of your names are on any relevant documents, if you so wish. This can range from your housing arrangement, to your cars, and even to the pets you own. If children are involved, you must make sure their school and medical records are up-to-date — and if you and/or your spouse are still in school, make sure to update your own records.

If you haven’t already, add your spouse’s name to your lease or sign a new deed with their name on it. In the event that you already had that done, now is the time to start packing up your old place and planning for the new one. If you were waiting until you were married to dive into the housing market, now is your moment to take the plunge. 

Subsequently, you should decide how to deal with bills, both routine and emergency. Who is responsible for what? 

Additionally, if there is anything that you or your spouse are a part of, such as a religion, a social club, etc. that you or your spouse can or must join after you are married, be sure to start that process, if you have not already. 

I know, the basics are boring, but this is married life in its truest form. If it’s any consolation, it’s only more fun from here on out. 

No. 2: Pleasantries 

Even though your wedding day is over, your job as the spouses of the hour hasn’t yet ended. This is an extension of the guest experience, the importance of which I discussed at length in my most recent blog. Additionally, this is when you start building your reputation as a married couple. 

Of course, your personalized thank-you cards are indispensable. However, as a wedding professional, I know that you must remember much more than that. 

In addition to thanking your guests and those who have sent you gifts and well wishes, there are many others you’ll definitely want to express your gratitude to. Be sure to thank your wedding party and your in-laws. If you haven’t already, treat them to a gift or an experience, such as a trip, a service, or a dinner. Put thought into whatever you choose to ensure that each individual will truly enjoy what they receive. 

After that, make a list of everyone else who helped make your day special, such as the people at your venue, your officiant, your vendors, and anyone else who had a positive impact on you and your day. Let them know that you appreciate them and their work. Leave a glowing review, and if appropriate, send them a token of your thanks. You’ve celebrated your love, and now it’s time to keep spreading it. 

No. 3: Priorities 

Remember all of the priorities that I told you to consider in the hard questions blog, such as children, religion, family time, and life goals? However much (or little) you’ve planned, it’s time to put those plans into action and figure out how they’ll look for you in practice. 

This is not to say that you must start on all of your goals right here, right now. However, it’s time to start living a life full of what you prioritize most as a couple. If you’re religious, start working your practices into your daily life. If you want children in the near future, start preparing to bring them into your life. Establish a routine conducive to keeping what you want to keep in your lives and fulfilling the promises of your vows. Prioritize your family, your careers, and most of all, each other. 

Now that you’re bringing your goals into the real world, also try to scope out your obstacles. Often, it is easy to miss these before the wedding, and some new ones may have revealed themselves to you. Balance the expectations you had with the reality, and figure out how to move forward together. 

No. 4: Preservation 

After all of that, I give you full permission to be nostalgic for your wedding day. Think of all the beautiful memories and feelings you wish to keep close to your heart. Then, plan how you’ll go about doing it. 

Obviously, I’m referencing physical methods of preservation, such as preserving your wedding outfits and flowers, and curating a photo album if your photographer hasn’t done that for you. One of your first major decisions as a married couple is where to put your wedding portrait! 

However, I’m not just talking about the physical ways you want to remember your wedding day. Rather, I’m talking about something bigger.

Now that the hullabaloo of the wedding and honeymoon is all over, it’s just you and your spouse, ready to take on life together. That means from here on out, you will be with each other for the boring and the exciting, the paperwork and the pleasantries. As you know from your unmarried life, the day-to-day can become monotonous, and there’s no helping that. 

However, you have one thing on your side now: the love of your life. 

True love can make a grey November day into the sunniest July afternoon. As such, it is crucial that you and your spouse continue to prioritize each other, no matter what. Hold true to the promises you made in your vows and then some. When you preserve the memory of your wedding day, make sure to preserve the joy you felt on that day, too, no matter how you choose to do it. 

I have exciting news: once you’ve completed everything else on this list, this is the one thing you get to do for the rest of your life.